colt 45

12/26/16 45th open mic

Yep, I read two jokes I basically had them memorized but I wanted to make sure I said them correctly.  The one about an incident after a Cleveland Indians game (in Cleveland) has always been a weak joke, not sure how to fix it.  Funny how short the thing is (120+ words) and how hard it has been to memorize.  The other joke about a coworker that we dubbed "mr. serious" had a strong opening and ending but the middle was blah.  I rewrote that one and added close to 50 words to it after I got home from the open mic last night.  I'm hoping that its fixed.  Then I screwed up another joke.  Finally I did anger issues the joke that tells you why if your mad at your father you shouldn't wait till he's dead to resolve things.  Overall a crappy set.

next week I'll probably record my set as long as I go...

christmas ornament

12/19/16

yep I got a Christmas Ornament for being a comic on Monday night.  My set went okay.

unprepared

12/12/16

I literally threw this set together and really wasn't prepared.  I didn't work on any new material.  I trashed one joke a week ago since I rewrote it (home room teacher).  The one that seemed to piss people off when I posted it online.  Anyways I used a notecard for the first time in a couple weeks and forgot my camera.  So I did a bunch of old jokes, and my timing was off.  Plus I was short on the time for the first time in sometime.  The audience reaction was good since each joke I did is a good joke.  I don't think any of them were really long which caused the time to be short.

43rd open mic

 

Year 3 in review

stats
Practice Preformances: 1
Comedy Open Mics: 25
Friends: 1

I started performing on December 2nd 2013.  I hope that success comes but the goal is bring joy into people's life.

previous years
year 2

42nd open mic

11/21/16
So I recorded my set, I was really nervous.  The link below is the only thing that was good enough quality for me to post on youtube.  Plus, I have a longer version of this joke which I'm going to start working on soon. click the link
 

burn it down and walk away

11/16/16
So a fellow comedian from the Kutztown area told me and he had seen me at Lizard Lounge was at this open mic.  He complemented my material before and after my set.  Plus he thinks I should start going to Philly.  I agree, but I need a job first so I can go to Philly, Baltimore, D.C. and their surrounding metro areas.

My set was good, I'm done with using note cards.  I hope to get shows soon and post videos me making people laugh.

I probably won't be at this open mic next month (dec 21) because of a scheduling conflict.
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So I have a trump bit, hmmmmmmmm what to do with it, after the 21st I'll start working on it
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the title is a zao lyric quote

episode 40

bonfire

10/24/2016
my 40th performance

I had a great set, and for the first time I made it to the light (4 minutes) without looking at a notecard with the joke names.  This is a huge deal to me and I plan to build on it.  I ignored the insults after my set because it came from the same people who whine about my sets.  Plus they didn't say anything necessarily horrible.  I get it because I'm not a shallow comedian who thinks comedy is just about sex and saying 'fuck' as many times as possible in a comedic set even when it becomes redundant.  I become a target because I'm different.  I take it as a complement that people are talking about me afterwards, it doesn't matter to me if its good or bad.  I did 4 bits the newest one went off really well, I was going to record the set but at the last minute I decided against it because I thought it would be awkward to give somebody my camera right before my set.  When they weren't prepared for it.

fan page: matthew fulmer

3 minute ninja

10/19/16

So I drove to this open mic expecting 5-7 and got 3 minutes, its 24 miles away from my house but I'm understanding.  I would call it an average performance and the video sound was horrible and the response wasn't great so I'm not planning on posting what was recorded.  I'm hoping it goes back to 5-7 minutes.  I also had the wrong start time which was annoying overall I left fairly annoyed because I would have prepared differently and used different jokes with the shorter time had I known ahead of time.  and yes nobody showed up but what else is new.  People lie to me all the time and tell me their going to come to my performances, thankfully that didn't happen in this case.

an accomplished goal

I did the longest joke I've ever performed at close to 300 words and its was a train wreck but I got through the whole joke which was the goal.  I'll find out on the 19th if I need to fix anything because the lizard lounge doesn't have the final say on the jokes I write.  Personally I hate the venue but I'm stuck since I don't have a job.  Plus I'll have the joke fully memorized by then since I only had it partially memorized.

9 26 16

well I went to a funeral in the morning for a high school friend and had a set that was basically the same material as the 21st the biggest difference was the crowd size.  the crowd was a lot smaller at lizard lounge.  I got some laughs but again I'm starting to realize that everyone's favorite dirty lounge doesn't get the final say on whether I'm funny or the material I perform is funny.

the nervous anthem

9/21/16
I had a great time at this once a month open mic.  I was fairly nervous, stage fright my constant foe.  The new material I did worked fairly well, I screwed up jokes because of the nerves and wasted a couple minutes trying to find my joke list.  For once I wasn't attacked for my material, it was refreshing.  Personally when people attack me its shows their insecurities and that their not man enough to talk to me about the material I do.  If you think attacking me is going to advance your career your an idiot.

an ode to smart titles

8/29/2016

so much for memorizing the set order, I guess I'll try that next week.  the audience was small which made it hard for me to tell if a new joke worked but what else is new nobody goes to that dump.  Some people laughed which was nice.

35th performance

A Salute to my Imaginary Friends

8/22

So I succeed in doing a set without looking at a note card for the first time, yea me.  The lack of an audience was striking but all my imaginary friends were there cheering for me.  The set was okay.

August 15 2016

My first set in a month. I did a new bit which is over 200 words, I'm not sure what to think because I was so nervous, my timing was off.  Jokes that normally kill didn't seem to work, I had an okay ending, overall a mixed bag.  I'll do the new bit in the future hopefully the audience won't suck and the bit will get more laughs, it got some laughs so its not worthy of the trash heap.

7/11/16

I had a horrible set, boo hoo.

6/27/16

I had a good set, I tried a new bit about my x home room teacher who is now in jail for child molestation, it went well, I make fun of him not the victims because I'm not ignorant.  A friend from Tuesday night came which was nice.  Since its been over two years since somebody has seen me preform.

no. 30

So I had a great set and I did some new material.  I enjoyed myself... yea this isn't a long post.

my 30th open mic.

ps the host complemented me on my set.

free motivation

I didn't record my set which I think was over 6 minutes for various reasons. 

I want to thank the 2 people who insulted me after my set, I forgive you and thank you for the free motivation.

next week I might have somebody take pictures since I'm normally at the end its pointless to record, I'm normally 3rd with the host who does this week.

to my friends

Originally posted april 20 on my travel and comedy fan pages

To my friends...

The doctor who did the colonoscopy did not find anything wrong. He thinks I had an infection in my intestines which caused the blood in my stool and the intense pain I was having. He said it should never return. He didn't find any cancer, Crohn's disease, ulcerative colitis or anything else. I have felt better for almost a month now and I feel so relieved that I can get on with my life. I want to thank my friends for praying for me, and my other friends who knew about it and gave me encouraging words. I really appreciated it and it impacted me. so thanks and God bless.
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June 3
What some people might not realize is that this started out minor and I ignored it thinking it would go away, it didn't it was beyond horrible, I'm so thankful that I got better.

memorial day

overall I tried to do a set from memory wasn't that successful, I'm going to do this every week then bring out the set so I can get the light.  the only people who were there were comedians and 1 wife of the one comedian.

 

may 23, 2016

so this set almost didn't happen because around 8:35 the bartender T (and manager) gave all the comedians the option that if no audience showed up by 9 he would cancel it, we all agreed to it.  Then around 8:45 two audience members showed up, so we did he open mic.

I did older material stuff I don't normally do, since I didn't feel like doing some of the better material, some of it bombed and a couple jokes which I regularly do worked as usual interesting night.

May 16, 2016

so after almost two months I returned to preforming.  I talked about a recent colonoscopy and for the first time my cleft palate & lip, it went well, my language was a little profane since I hadn't prewritten the material.

blue m&ms

march 21, 2016

so I had a good short set, I did over 3 minutes because so many people signed up.  I did 4 jokes, 1 new one about my grandfather, it went over really well now I guess I should start attempting the longer ones (200 words +).

March 7, 2016

Boy I was nervous last night.  My mouth was dry and the nervousness was screwing up my voice.  I sounded like I had a catcher's mitt over my mouth.  I didn't fold like a crappy poker player or give in like a sucker and run off the stage before I got the light.

People laughed at my jokes because I'm funny.  If I wouldn't have been so nervous, the performance would have been better.  Plus it wouldn't have been so rough - performance and voice.

Finally, this open mic is dedicated to my aunt Jeanne who recently passed away.

a response

this performance and the next open mic are dedicated to my aunt Jeanne who passed away on February 24th of a brain infection.

So I did 3 bits at my small group last night, I want to thank my friends for listening.

set list
al capone, anger issues, m&c

other practice performances
thanksgiving

feb 1, 2016

the time the comedians got was cut because of their were more people than normal, I did 3 minutes felt like quitting before I got the light but I didn't do it.  My set blah I screwed up at least 3 jokes.  I'll do better next week and practice more.

january 11, 2015

What to say about my set I went short which is my fault, I had enough material for the light.  I'm not sure why I gave up so easily.  I did screw up a couple jokes which cut time off my set.  Next bit up is the al capone bit.  Once I do that I have 4 jokes that are longer than that one the longest being over 480 words, I call that one the monster.

I think the reason I did a short set is my aunt in Allentown is dying.

I got some good advice from another comic which I appreciated.

blackjack

Jan 4, 2016

So my brother and his wife had to cancel because they couldn't find a sitter.  I liked my sister-in-law's response, "Kick ass though!"

I had a great set and I killed, I never knew saying true story would get suck a big laugh.  I keep screwing up a couple of the jokes.  I was hardly nervous this week

I had a nice talk with one of the comedians afterwards.  He was interested in my style and how I write material, it was interesting.  I keep getting compliments from various people, its nice but my goal in life isn't to have comedians kiss my ass.  The goal is to be humble not arrogant or stuck up.

set
spider burning, anger issues, Mary Poppins, blue candy, what nothin, and MacGyver's rescue mission